Ways to Annoy Will Scarlett
by ifeelfreaky
Summary: This is the second installment of a series called "Ways to Annoy..." Ever wanted to hand 'our dear William' over to the Boy Scouts? Drop acorns on his head? Or maybe dye his things bright orange? Co-authored by Mindy Morganna


**Hey! So I was asked by Mindy Morganna to make a series of "Ways to Annoy..." This is the second installment. Mindy Morganna has co-authored this one and #s 2, 5, 6, 8, 10, 12, 15, and 21 belong to her. They're in bold to make sure that credit is given where credit is due. Disclaimer: I do not own BBC Robin Hood. If I owned it you'd see Marian alive and kicking. There's proof, see? Read, Review, and Enjoy!**

Ways to Annoy Will Scarlett

#1- Clear your throat and mutter, "Are you _sure_ this contraption of yours will work?" after he's just finished explaining in great detail how it works and why.

**#2**- Accuse him of being a traitor. Repeat.

#3- Take out your electric guitar and demand he make you one disguised as a machine gun. Not that he'll what either of them even _are, _but hey.

#4- Bring in a Boy Scout troop and proclaim that he's joined the ranks, even though he probably won't know who or what Boy Scouts are. (He'd make a good Boy Scout, if you think about it…)

**#5**- Show him all the slashy videos of him and Alan on YouTube. While Djaq is watching.

**#6**- Tell him the others put them there and turn to glare at them as if you had nothing to do with it.

#7- Grab your hatchet and hack away at a log until it resembles a shape of something or other. Show it proudly to him and watch as he tries to figure out what exactly it is and give you creative criticism when he's not even sure.

**#8**- Shave off his little moustache when he is sleeping. Claim that Alan did it, after all you saw him. To make sure that this actually is accepted as truth give Alan a few free rounds of beer before he retires for the night. He won't even be able to remember if he did or not!

#9- Ask if he can wiggle his mustache. Twitch it… ANYTHING!

**#10**- Every time you drink say, "Here's to dearly departed dead dad Dan!" (Cruel, I know!)

#11- Dare him to tell Djaq that he loves her before they get trapped in the barn. And say that he should proclaim it loudly in front of the whole gang.

**#12**- Try and make him come home to be a carpenter.

#13- Every time he enters the same room say (in a game-show host way) "And he-e-eres Will Scarlett!!"

#14- Once a day walk up to him and shake his hand, pumping it with great exuberance. If he asks why you keep doing this, say, "Shh, it's a secret."

**#15**- Dye everything he owns bright orange and tell him you thought it was his favorite color. Oops! Guess it's not.

#16- Whenever he and Alan sit next to each other say, "Aww… How cute!"

#17- Put twinkle lights all over the 'secret' entrance to the outlaw camp. Claim that you couldn't find your way and needed something to stand out.

#18- Point in the distance scream, "BUNNIES!!" randomly. Following each, hop for the next half hour. Do it despite where you are or what you're doing. If you're raiding Nottingham Castle late at night... DO IT!! If you're watching an argument at the camp... DO IT!! If you're sitting in silence... DO IT!!

#19- Steal the blanket off his bed and tell him that you need it for your imaginary friend, Cowboy Jeff. When he asks why Cowboy Jeff can't just share _your _blanket, tell him, "To share my blanket he'd also have to share my bed, and although this is something _you _might do, I wouldn't." Watch his and Djaq's faces after this comment.

#20- On Halloween dress up as him with a fake hatchet embedded in your forehead. (Not real, please. I don't want sued.)

**#21**- Stand watching him ride/fight/sing for a while then announce loudly "I really think Alan has the edge on this." _Edge _away quickly.

#22- Climb a tree and continually drop acorns and other nuts down on his head. Scream down to him, "Wait one minute! I'll get that evil squirrel for you!!" Leap about in the tree as if you really are chasing a squirrel, dropping nuts all the while.

#23- Rig his booby trap just before he heads in that direction. Steal Robin's line and tell him that he looks gorgeous up there and that, honestly, he'd look gorgeous from any angle. (heh heh)

#24- Bring up the fact around the campfire that he was spying on Djaq back during that first day, when she was trying to bathe.

#25- Whenever you speak to him refer to him as, "My dear William," in a posh, up-class British accent. Unless you are British and already one of those lovely accents and in that case kudos to you!

**My next installment is to be "Ways to Annoy Robin of Locksley" but what about this one? Did you like it? "I laughed, I cried... it moved me Bob." There's a timeless quote from my childhood! Did you laugh? Did you cry? (I kind doubt that one...) Did it move you? Is my name Bob? No, my name is not Bob. That would be weird... **

**That review button begging to be clicked!! **


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